CHEKIT: Iraq War Coalition Fatalities

Press the button.

I'd go on and on and on as to how cool this is, BoingBoing, if it wasn't so sad and moving and disturbing.

HOUSEKEEPING: Apologies and peppercorns

I promise - more posts after the weekend. Until then:

Get yourself some Spice House action. The UPS guy just delivered some rib rubs, jerk seasonings, barbecue sauce makings and TELLICHERRY PEPPERCORNS, yo. I'm a happy man.

CHEKIT: Conan O'Brien is coming to Chicago

Please, please, PLEASE let Triumph come along. PLEASE, GOD.

CHEKIT: Happy St. Patrick's Day, ya poser.

Anyone can turn the lights down, install a lot of dark wood booths and benches and brass accents in a room and call themselves an Irish pub, but it takes the efforts of the Irish Pub Company to turn the art of faux O'Boozery into an profitable, worldwide enterprise:

In the last 15 years, Dublin-based IPCo and its competitors have fabricated and installed more than 1,800 watering holes in more than 50 countries. Guinness threw its weight (and that of its global parent Diageo) behind the movement, and an industry was built around the reproduction of "Irishness" on every continent—and even in Ireland itself. IPCo has built 40 ersatz pubs on the Emerald Isle, opening them beside the long-standing establishments on which they were based.

IPCo's designers claim to have "developed ways of re-creating Irish pubs which would be successful, culturally and commercially, anywhere in the world." To wit, they offer five basic styles: The "Country Cottage," with its timber beams and stone floors, is supposed to resemble a rural house that gradually became a commercial establishment. The "Gaelic" design features rough-hewn doors and murals based on Irish folklore. You might, instead, choose the "Traditional Pub Shop," which includes a fake store (like an apothecary), or the "Brewery" style, which includes empty casks and other brewery detritus, or "Victorian Dublin," an upscale stained-glass joint. IPCo will assemble your chosen pub in Ireland. Then they'll bring the whole thing to your space and set it up. All you have to do is some basic prep, and voilà! Ireland arrives in Dubai. (IPCo has built several pubs and a mock village there.)

Erin go Bragh! (which is Gaelic for "gratuity included.")

CHEKIT: Doctor Who on Sci-Fi.

I want to make it clear to you, gentle reader, that I am in no way excited about the US premiere of Doctor Who this Friday at 8 PM CST on the SciFi network, that I have not been anticipating the stateside release of the first new episodes in fifteen years in any way, and that I will not be programming my TiVo to record all the new episodes of Doctor Who or any old ones that SciFi, BBCAmerica or PBS sees fit to release in conjunction with this, the least-looked-forward-to debut of any show this year. Just in case you were wondering.

MUZIK: Belle and Sebastian, New Pornographers AND Clap Your Hands Say Yeah! Live, downloadable and free.

JACKPOT.

Live sets from three of the best bands in the indieverse today, all from the grand arbiter of tunedom, All Songs Considered. Streaming or downloadable, bitches. Go get it.

CHEKIT: March Madness.

Your comments, suggestions and ridicule are welcome.

And YES, I did pick Winthrop. So did a bunch of other folks. Leave me alone.

MUZIK: Dave Chapelle's Block Party

Big booty people gotta share with a small booty.

The trailer promises. Dave Chapelle delivers.

I loves me some Mos Def. Some Kanye. Some FUGEES, for goodness sakes. And if you were in the Bedford-Stuyvesant neighborhood in Brooklyn that glorious day two summers ago (when Dave was at the height of his powers, before he went AWOL from Comedy Central) you would've been lovin' it, too. Go see what all the hubbub's about - and enjoy one of sweetest, funkiest, funniest and most joyous movies I've seen in the last year. If the theater weren't half-filled by grumpy white folks, I would've been workin' it in the aisle.

MUZIK: M is for MUZIK

The spring mix is in the works. Email me to suggest songs or request a copy.

CHEKIT: The Crappiest Invention of All Time

Nick Schulz over at Slate has some issues with that creepy bathoom convenience, the auto-flush toilet:

To understand why hands-free toilet technology stinks, you must first understand three things that any well-designed loo should permit you to do.

1) Clean the pool. You must be able to flush the toilet easily before sitting down, in case any detritus remains from a previous, inconsiderate visitor.

2) Clean the pool, again. You must be able to flush more than once after you are done. Some of us are more prolific than others, and courteous patrons will want to ensure that Point 1 is unnecessary for whomever follows.

3) Issue a courtesy flush. If you plan to settle down with the sports page, you should flush immediately after dropping the kids at the pool. There's no need to let the kids linger any longer than absolutely necessary. This is for the benefit of other visitors.

Remarkably, the automatic-flush toilet makes all three of these tasks more difficult. Consider the following scenario: You enter a nearly full house, and only one stall is free. This is probably because those who got to the restroom first saw the remains of someone else's visit and moved on to one of the cleaner stalls. (See Point 1 above.) What are you to do? The only way to clean the pool is to sit down and let the latrine laser register your presence. Then you must get up and hope you sat on top of the foul commode long enough to "tell" the laser to issue a flush command. Meanwhile, the other patrons are probably aware that you are going through this humiliating exercise, as they saw the stall's condition before you arrived.

I, too, have experienced the dreaded "ghost flush" in which an auto-flush toilet initiates the flushing process while you're still in situ, spraying toilet water up onto your bum. If this were a bidet, that would be one thing, but it's most likely an airport toilet, where God-knows-what - including what you've just contributed - is being splashed up onto you.

MUZIK: Natalie Portman, the Lonely Island boys, and SNL

I've always liked that Natalie Portman gal. Such a sweetheart.

CHEKIT: H5N1 be DAMNED. I want some eggs, yo.

I've toyed with the notion of raising a couple of chickens for a few years now - ultra-fresh eggs taste like a soft-boiled miracle - but I never really gave it any serious thought. (Okay - I did call city hall to see what sorta restrictions there were on keeping farm animals - to their credit, they didn't laugh at me on the phone - at least, not at a volume that I could hear.)

And then, I got this email yesterday:

Hello!

A while ago you contacted us to find out if the eglu was available in the States. Well, we’re just writing to let you know we’ve made it! You can now order an eglu and in recognition of your enthusiasm and pioneering spirit, we are offering you an exclusive opportunity to be one of the first eglu owners in America!

We have developed a brand new website just for you where you can find out more. If you visit www.omlet.us you’ll find all you need to know about the eglu, how to order and of course the useful guides on keeping chickens and rabbits.

Omlet is offering a full service in America – you deserve nothing less! As well as the full range of eglus, in all colours, you can also order fully grown chickens to be sent directly to you. Visit the website and have a look at the beautiful Gingernut Ranger, who is an excellent egg layer.

If you have any questions then we are here to help, you can call us Toll Free on 1-86-OMLET-USA or email info@omlet.us. Our telephone lines are answered between 8am and 6pm CST with an answerphone at all other times.

We really hope you enjoy the website,

Yours,

James, Simon, Will and Johannes

PS. If you order an eglu right away, you’ll benefit from a special introductory price.
PPS. There is a full 30 day moneyback guarantee on the eglu so you have a no risk way of finding out if the eglu is right for you.

Dudes. I think there's a chance of some really asskicking frittatas in my future. Though I have to question the wisdom of the 30 day guarantee. How does one return a chicken via UPS, exactly?

FILM: Nacho Libre

The quiet little mice over at AICN had this a month ago - but we're all following Harry on this kind of stuff, ain't we?

Hey folks, Harry here... Many of you are addicted to pootykat fracking lame American Wrestling... but the FACTS are, that's exactly what it is... pootykat fracking lame American Wrestling! Real men wear Mexican Masks and Wrestle for God! That's right... Real Wrestling Heroes Pile Drive for the Lord! And there's no more real a Mexican Wrestler than JACK BLACK as NACHO LIBRE! You know it, I know it... and God sure as blazes knows it! First... Behold the Masked Mexican Marvel!

To be fair, I Googled the movie after reading about it on Kotaku, so I gotta credit them both - but I'm realizing that, after posting an excerpt of an internet movie news site item that I read about on a video gaming blog to my own collection of links and web-heavy snarky commentary, maybe I should stop with the posting and the linking and maybe find out what it's like to kiss a girl.

Of course, not all of us can be like Kip, chatting online with babes all day.

That is Pedro, by the way, in the bottom photo, standing next to Jack Black. Nacho Libre is Jared Hess' follow-up project to his 2004 feature about Sir Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance, who summoned the help of Scotland's local wizards to cast a protective spell over the lake and its local residents and all those who seek for the peaceful existence of our underwater ally.

Many thanks to PBP and Kingmaker, who, upon hearing I'd never seen the first film, plopped me in front of their TV and Pay-Per-View'd me into cringeworthy, large-taloned bliss.

CHEKIT: Anna Nicole + Antonin

I wanna root (hee hee) for Anna Nicole Smith. For her and her and her ridiculous jibblies. Even though I know she'd spend the whole wad on bonbons and pink velour track suits. And her dead husband's son? Who WOULDN'T root against that tightass? I mean, Anna Nicole may be a golddigger, but at least she never tried to forge three pages out of her father's will.

The problem is: a certain former Texas govenor is also arguing for the former Vickie Lynn:

Speaking of wealthy Texas oilmen whose lawyers can justify just about anything, the president has joined this appeal on Anna's side. Assistant to the Solicitor General Deanne Maynard has 10 minutes to argue (not surprisingly) for giving more expansive jurisdiction to federal courts. The justices question her very little as she argues that the reason people create trusts—as opposed to wills—is precisely that they want to avoid probate. So, why is this a probate matter at all?

It's not that I'm reflexively opposed to anything il Bushe has to say. It just gives me the creepy crawlies when he and I want the same thing - though I'm convinced his position is less about expanding the power of the Federal courts and more about having an excuse to giggle when discussing filing amicus curiae briefs. ("hee hee! I'd like to be a friend of her court! Ha! Briefs! Hopefully mine! Wooo! She's a Texas girl, right, Dick? She knows how to party!")

Sex, money, and distinguished legal commentators making veiled comments about enormous boobies. I love SCOTUS!