All I did was ask Mary Elizabeth:
What's Little Rock like?
And in reply, I got this:
Little Rock sucks. This is one of the most backward, dumbest, fattest, poorest, conservative cities in the southern United States. Of course you can find dumber, fatter, poorer, more conservative cities around these parts, but they have a population of 8,000 and haven't won a state high school football championship in 13 years (or they've won every state high school football championship for the last 13 years).
Little Rock Central has won the state 4A football championship for the last 2 years, thank you very much. I think we'll even do OK without Clark Irwin, our star quarterback (who is having to WALK ON to the Razorback team in the fall, just because he is small. I think when your parents have donated that much to the athletic department AND you are the number one quarterback in the state (best stats, won an out and out contest, and the best raised) you should AT LEAST not be forced to walk on come August). LRCHS also has the most national merit scholars - not only per capita but in sheer numbers.
I digress.
Contrary to popular belief, we are civilized - we don't walk around in ripped overalls and bare feet. Most of us have teeth, even if some of the state STILL doesn't put fluoride in the water. Damn this state is dumb. So dumb it's mean to make fun of us. Our legislature is a bunch of hillbillies who like to hear themselves talk. They also like to legislate against evil. Evil being alcohol (AR has some of the highest alcohol taxes in the country), gay rights (NO SIR THEY CANNOT ADOPT OR TAKE IN FOSTER CHILDREN. NOW WAY! SAME SEX MARRIAGE IS OFFENSIVE. THE TERM IS OFFENSIVE! WHY DON'T WE JUST BURN THE KING JAMES BIBLE?! WHY IS THE KING JAMES BIBLE NOT OUR STATE CONSTITUTION?), baby killing (not only do we have 48 hour parental notification for underage sluts, now we have parental consent. By the way, I had an abortion on the way to work this morning. I thought about going to get a McGriddle, but decided to get an abortion instead. Luckily I live in a town with ONE of the TWO abortion clinics in the state.), hunting rights (as in extended hunting, weakening animal abuse laws, and being able to shoot stray animals if they wander onto your property), and taxes (you wouldn't believe the corporate tax breaks we give. It's criminal and we STILL can't get a businesses to come here).
What is Little Rock like? It's kind of interesting but I am sick of it. It's fun if you are married (a sport in a state with the second highest divorce rate in the country). If you are single and not into church, it's hell. I'm in hell, Theo. I'm a spinster in hell. It's hard enough to leave my house knowing I'm 26 and single, but I don't even have a boyfriend. It's hard to get the courage to leave the house without a boyfriend, but how are you supposed to get a boyfriend if you don't leave the house?
Our indie rock culture is pretty strong. It's easy to be a big fish in this pond, though. There are even levels of indie rock-ness with their own bars and hangouts. It can get exhausting. We have a few cool 'zines and one all girl punk rock band.
There is also other hangouts depending on where you work and or what you do. One thing that brings us all together is the deck at Cajun's, Cajun's Wharf that is. Cajun's is down by the river, as stone's throw from downtown, and during the summer, the deck is hopping. The deck is hopping on Thursdays (Thursday is the new Friday, you know). Great drink specials, a good band, and lots of people. The trick is to get there early and get a good table. To me a good table is usually one or two tables away from the major walkways and not near the river. Sit at the edge of the deck and you will get swarmed with mosquitoes. It's not pretty. Not pretty to be swatting and drinking, and not pretty the next day when you are just eaten up with bites. I like the deck at Cajuns because it takes all kinds. You'll find the forty somethings, the thirty somethings, and the twentysomethings. Most people are employed and everyone wants to get laid. Lots of networking goes on and lots of flirting. If you go early, there are lots of older men there, who can get off work early (because they are partner or own the joint), and they just love to buy a young thing a drink, especially one that is conservatively dressed and looks shy. I can look shy and even my sluttiest of outfits is no match for some of the getups that are seen on the deck (I mean, what do these girls wear on Saturday night if this is only Thursday?).
Best to get out of Cajun's around 8-ish on a Thursday night. They start charging a cover at 8p and the place fills up with people intent on going OUT, not casually drinking after work. If it's been a good night, you are sober enough to drive somewhere with friends and have dinner. If it's been a great night, you are sober enough to meet the hottie you met on the deck for dinner.
I will admit that I have never been sober enough to meet the hottie I met on the deck for dinner. I had a few invitations, but I've never had the courage to do it. This summer I will. This summer I do. Partly because I need new friends, partly because I am that cute, and partly (mostly?) because a sugar daddy is so much better than a boyfriend.
Give me more specifics on what you want. This place is a crazy fucking pit is what it is.
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